Agape

Who I am is unimportant. What is important is that people get to know who He is. This is a journal made for that purpose.

A while back a former gang member came to our church. He was heavily tattooed and rough around the edges, but he was curious to see what church was like. He had a relationship with Jesus and seemed to get fairly involved with the church. After a few months, I found out the guy was no longer coming to the church. When asked why he didn’t come anymore, he gave the following explanation: “I had the wrong idea of what church was going to be like. When I joined the church, I thought it was going to be like joining a gang. You see, in the gangs we weren’t just nice to each other once a week—we were family.” That killed me because I knew that what he expected is what the church is intended to be. It saddened me to think that a gang could paint a better picture of commitment, loyalty, and family than the local church body. The church is intended to be a beautiful place of community. A place where wealth is shared and when one suffers, everyone suffers. A place where when one rejoices, everyone rejoices. A place where everyone experiences real love and acceptance in the midst of great honesty about our brokenness. Yet most of the time this is not even close to how we would describe our churches.

—Francis Chan (via nonelikejesus)

(Source: sinfreed, via leadme2thecross)

I’m getting a little bit worried over raising support again. There’s so much insecurity, and I’m not sure whether I can get all the money. I’ve sent out a lot of letters, but there’s still a lot I need to write. Now I can understand why the Israelites continued to store manna even when God commanded them not to. It’s scary facing a future clouded with doubt and insecurity. It takes a lot of effort to remember that God is still there providing. But He is always there, and I know I can trust in Him. If He really wants me to go on this mission trip, then He will get me there no matter what. He will always provide for me.

 The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. 
     He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters, 
     he refreshes my soul. 
He guides me along the right paths 
    for his name’s sake. 
 Even though I walk
    through the valley of the shadow of death, 
I will fear no evil, 
    for you are with me; 
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

 You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; 
    my cup overflows.
 Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
    forever.

-Psalm 23

PTL Moment!

So, as some of you know, I’m going on a summer mission project with Epic Movement to San Francisco from June 16 to August 6. In order to raise funds for this trip, I have to write support letters and send them out to everyone I know. And, well I’ve been stressing out since I’m barely finding time to write out the letters, and I’m really doubting whether I can raise enough money.

So I was working on some of them earlier at the SCC. I had to get back to homework though, so I left a stack of printed letters right next to me. While I was doing my homework, this guy was sitting besides me right next to my letters. After a while he left, and everything was normall. Then about an hour later, he came back, tapped me on the back, and asked, “Hey, are you Justin?” Confused, I mumbled out a, “Yes…?” Then he replied with, “Sorry to bother you, but this is for you!” And he gave me a folded up sheet of paper.” I was like, “O…k, thank you.” and then he left. Still confused I opened up the paper and was very surprised by what I found inside. A note was written that said:

“Sorry for eavesdropping on your letters. Use this towards your summer mission. God bless. May the light of Christ always be with you.”

And with the note was forty dollars in cash! I was left speechless! I just stopped working on my project to type out this blog. God is so good! I just don’t know what to say anymore! But God really does provide! I’ve been so worried for the past two weeks. Even though I’ve tried telling myself to trust God and have faith in Him, at my heart, I knew I was still nervous, worried, and stressed. But again, God isgood!…I kind of want to cry out of joy right now…BUT IT’S OKAY! I don’t want to cause a scene in the SCC! Praise the Lord!

BTW, many of you will be receiving support letters from me soon! Just letting you know!

Prayer Request

I know I haven’t posted in a long time, but I have a prayer request!

Please pray for Epic Movement along with the rest of Campus Crusade for Christ as we’re about to go off to Big Break! If you don’t know what this is, Cru (Campus Crusade for Christ) is having a missions conference during the entire Spring Break at Panama City Beach, Florida, the Spring Break capitol of the U.S. And while thousands of college students are seeking fun in the sun, we’ll be seeking them as we chase after Christ. So, please pray for safe travels as this will be a 14 hour car drive, and ask God to really teach us and move within us during this conference. Thanks, and God bless!

Jesus, I need to give myself up. I am not strong enough to love You and walk with You on my own. I can’t do it, and I need You. O need You deeply and desperately. I believe You are worth it, that You are better than anything else I could have in this life or the next. I want You. And when I don’t, I want to want You. Be all in me. Take all of me. Have Your way with me.

—Francis Chan, Crazy Love: Overwhelmed by a Relentless God

Yay

I’m really tired, so this post may not be entirely coherent, but I felt it was time to finally write another blog.

First thing’s first, I really want to give God a whole bunch of praise. I’ve really seen Him work in my life this past week and a half. It started off when I went to AAIV’s Word in the Woods. I’ll be completely honest. I didn’t really enjoy it. I was cold, tired, and I just wanted to go home. But then on the way back home, Chris, Diana, and Amber started talking about problems they felt were in the fellowship. It was really intriguing since as I freshman, I don’t see many of the things that are happening behind the scenes in the leadership team. And hearing about all these issues that were happening really stirred within me a desire to help out. I’m tired of remaining in my comfort zone and doing little to serve Christ and the rest of His family. So then for the rest of the weekend, I had lots of other conversations about leadership and stuff with other people within AAIV. One of the really amazing conversations though was with Justin Yip. He ended up sharing his testimony, and well my reaction was just like O_O. I can’t give any more details than that, but if you ever decide you want to hear his testimony, then ask him yourself and see if he’s comfortable with sharing. Ever since hearing his testimony, I want to give praise to God whenever I see Justin. It’s just so awesome to see how God can work in someone’s life. Then on Monday, I had a conversation with Derek and he really helped me in seeing the importance of vision within a Christian fellowship, and he calmed me down from wanting to rush blindly into leadership. Ever since all these conversations, God had set into me a desire to serve and chase after the heart of God.

And there were a lot of awesome things that happened this week other than conversations. I was able to bond with a lot of people like Ben, Michael, Elliott, Joanne, Daniel, and many others. A friend finally accepted my invitation to come to large group after multiple rejections by many people. My quiet times have become a lot more fruitful since I decided to finally put more effort into them instead of just rushing through them before going to bed. I ate a lot of good food this past weekend. I can’t even remember all the blessings I’ve received this week, but I definitely want to thank and praise God for all the things He’s been doing in my life.